He’s mean, he’s green and he’s burdened with glorious purpose, ladies + gaybies, it’s our favorite god of mischief LOKIIIII.

Y’all… I’ve been waiting for fucking ever for the release of this show. It’s actually my introduction to the Disney- Marvel Plus universe since um… I haven’t actually seen Wanda Vision or Falcon + Winter Soldier yet.

I know, I know, fucking shame on me, but dude, I’ve been trying to get my shit together so I can move out of my family’s house + I don’t give myself enough down time to watch a new series; it’s always some rerun I end up watching thru my phone, specifically Living Single, Golden Girls + now The Nanny. (Fran’s fashion sense is to DIE FOR!)

HOWEVER, Tom Hiddleston is one of my loves as an actor, I absolutely adore him and his portrayal of Loki, so I knew I couldn’t miss out. And as the season premiere, episode 1 did NOT disappoint, as usual Marvel left me with my mouth wide open, drooling for more.

So like the other shows, Loki starts around Avengers: Endgame; you remember when he disappeared after snatching up the Tesseract when the Avengers went back in time? There, right there. 

And what happens? Loki gets himself into another load of shit starring a badass black woman and Owen Wilson. (Her actress name is Wunmi Mosaku btw, just looked it up). I’m definitely committing myself to binging Wandavision + Falcon and the Winter Soldier sometime before the Loki’s last episode. 

AND NOWWW for spoilers. I’m sorry homies, you must now exit the chatroom if you’re not looking for details because holy shit, I gotta get this out. 

Again, SPOILERS ALERT!!!

now that I’ve gotten that out of the way…

IT WAS… (unintelligible squeal noise).

I’m sorry I can’t seem to put into words how hyped I was and how that’s grown times infinity since I watched it the first time. Ha…infinity…see what I did there? 

I always loved Marvel’s comedic undertone and I knew that Loki would come with plenty of it. You know, being the god of mischief and all. 

Let me also say that as a fan, I have not read many comics besides Black Panther, so let’s get that out of the way. If you are a nerd man and you are shaking your head like “Pshh, female nerds, typical,” let me just say you can go to hell, sir and shut the fuck up while you’re at it.

I am a spirit of vast knowledge. I love to go way back…back into time, researching and reading all about subjects I’m obsessed with and while I’ve read a lot about Marvel, I had no idea the fucking shit I was getting into watching this first episode. Time keepers, variants, all that hoopla. I mean shit, there’s so many stories and information, I already get lost with the shit I do know. I’ve read a a lot of Marvel history, character + comic connections, etc and THIS is a whole other level; but I’m glad they brought it to us in a very 80’s vintage video-like way that was pretty simple to explain. It’s like Marvel knows our small brains are already overloaded on so many details. And now that I think about it, Wanda-Vision also looked very vintage. Ugh, I really need to watch all this shit.

Sorry, moving on…
So, Loki ends up in the Gobi desert of all places, which a writer from Buzzfeed says was supposed to be a reflection of when Tony stark landed in the desert back in Iron Man. That completely flew off my radar, but it makes sense. And then he’s caught and taken away by the men in black. Let me say putting Loki through this very airport security/ dmv- like experience was absolutely hilarious.

I felt Loki’s impatience the entire time, but if you didn’t feel sorry for him already, you damn sure feel him now. Sitting in a room with Owen Wilson telling you how much you suck at life and that you were meant to cause pain. JUST so others can achieve their highest selves; I mean god damn. Why don’t you just tell him shouldn’t have been born while you’re at it? And on top of that, us as the audience watching him watch his life play out until he dies in Infinity War ?!? WOW. That was fucking sad, absolutely painful. Losing his mom, dad, then seeing him team up with Thor. Then just seeing him laugh after it’s over. Ughhhhhh my heart…so many feelings, make it stop. 

I didn’t even know it was gonna work that way; that he was going to create another timeline just by disappearing with the Tesseract, but it certainly made things more interesting. Now they need Loki’s help finding….LOKI?? The hooded figure??

According to the nerd gods, the biggest rumor is that it’s possibly LADY LOKI???? 

Holy shit…breathe…holy shit…

And who exactly were those people the figure burned up?? 

I want more. NEOWW. 

Loki episode 2 releases this Wednesday, June 16th, only on HBO Max. So snag that password from your best friend or even your cousin Day Day. Unless you know…downloading is your thing. I won’t tell.

So how did y’all feel about episode 1?